Group Getaways Archives | InsideJourneys

I don’t like group getaways. There are too many personalities to contend with, too many logistical issues to manage, and no matter how carefully you plan, someone’s fragile ego always gets bruised.

However, a few years ago, when my best friend announced to family and friends that she wanted to celebrate an upcoming milestone birthday in South Africa, I knew that for her sake, I’d have to set aside my hang ups about group getaways.

I was lucky. By the time the real planning for the trip rolled around, there were only three of us – the birthday girl and a new friend, who’d been out with us a few times to concerts and dinners, and me.

Four friends at dinner — S.A. singer, Lorraine Klaasen at one of our Group Getaway Planning Meetings

Although my friend and I had taken short trips together, neither of us had traveled with our new friend. I wondered secretly what 2 ½ weeks of being in close proximity to each other would do to our friendships, especially when, to control costs, we’d decided where possible, to share a room.

At our first planning meeting for the trip, we discussed our quirks and pet peeves and each person listed their deal breaker behaviors. We also decided on a few ground rules: each of us had to make a three-item must-see/do list, and since we were a small group, we decided to participate in all nine activities, even if an item from someone’s list wasn’t of interest.

That rule might sound unfair but it was a brilliant idea, one that got us out of our comfort zones. It’s how the birthday girl and I ended up at a safari camp in Zimbabwe ooohing and aaahing over exotic animals we’d only seen on National Geographic television.

Since we were hitting three cities in South Africa, each of us took on the responsibility of planning a leg of the trip, from deciding which tour company to use, where to stay, to what to do on our infrequent free days, etc.

It took us a little more than a year to pull the trip together, and during that time, we were in constant communication via email, phone, and face-to-face meetings, usually over dinner at a South African restaurant. We discussed every aspect of the trip and shared whatever information we found on our own.

Not surprisingly, the meetings to plan the trip brought us closer than we’d been before. But no amount of bonding can change people’s personalities, and no matter how much you prepare to accommodate another’s idiosyncrasies, it always is a jar to the senses when you discover what they are.

Travelers at Sani Pass, Lesotho — Freezing at 9000′ Sani Pass, near Lesotho

While no one had a melt down during the eighteen-day trip, there were a few times when I felt ready to close my fingers around someone’s neck, and many times I was rubbed the wrong way by someone’s attitude. In the end, I realized that I could obsess about minor things, miss the beauty in front of me and mar the overall experience, or relax. After all, it was a vacation, not a marriage.

Planned carefully, a group getaway doesn’t have to be a disaster. Here are some tips from our trip that, I believe, not only helped us have a very memorable vacation, but have kept our friendship intact.

Have an organizer: Every group getaway must have an organizer – someone who’s very meticulous, has excellent communication skills, knows how to handle different personalities, can plan and delegate.
Plan is more than a 4-letter word: Plan as much as possible beforehand to ensure your group getaway is a success. Know each day’s activities in detail and make sure everyone else does too.
Know each person’s objective/s: Find out why participants want to be part of the group getaway and what activity they’d like to engage in. Getting each person to identify their ‘must-sees’ ensures that each person’s interests are addressed. Since our group was small, and we mostly liked the same things, it was easy for us to do things together.
Be inclusive: The best way to get participants invested in the success of the group getaway, is to include everyone. In our case, we were 3 people visiting 3 different cities so it was simple enough to plan. For larger group getaways, break the trip down into activities, cities, countries, etc., and make subgroups responsible for each segment.
Set deadlines: To ensure that you have a successful group getaway, it’s not only important to set deadlines for the payment of fees, but also to obtain information. For example, before you book a hotel, you’ll need to know that Uncle John wants a room with an ocean view.
Keep communication open: When it’s difficult to get together in person, use email, telephone, Skype, Google Hangouts, etc., to keep communication lines open.
Discuss pet peeves: Find out as much as you can about the person you’re sharing a room with. Understand that you might have to put up with behaviors that are different from your own but remember, it’s only for a short period.
Have fun! The whole reason to plan a group getaway is to gather friends, family, etc., together to share an experience and have fun. Once the trip begins, that should be the only thing on the agenda.